Is Your Confidence Being Ruined By Comparison?

Comparison! It is a horrible thing when it comes to your confidence! If you are like me, you have probably heard a thousand times not to compare yourself to others.  It sure is easier said than done!  I will admit that it is so easy to look at others and compare my shortcomings to their strengths.  You do not have to let comparison kill your confidence.

Do you find yourself doing this too?  You see that lady who seemingly has it all together.  The wife who seems perfect, the mom who has obedient well put-together children.  The teenage girl who has the cute clothes, boyfriend, and good grades.  The man who has the perfect job or the nicest truck!

Now, I know for a fact that I DO NOT have it all together.  Seems there's always something to clean at my house, a better meal I could make, I could always find something that needs improvement with myself or how well I take care of my husband and kids.  However, people have told me that they don't know how I do things or how I keep things all together, especially when I was working full time. 

It amazes me, how from the outside things look so different than they really are.  I am not talking about being a hypocrite and purposely fooling people.  I am talking about how we can look on the outside and judge someone.  Good or bad. 

You see many people can look at others and be jealous of their strengths, but many times people can look at others and judge them for their weaknesses.  No matter what end of the spectrum, this is not a healthy behavior.  We can hurt others or ourselves by comparing ourselves to each other in a good or bad way.

So, what's the answer?  Let's look at Jeremiah 29:11- "For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the LORD, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end." This verse is telling us that the Lord thinks about us.  He has a plan for our lives.  He created us for a purpose.  God gave us all different personalities, He gave us our strengths, and He also gave us our weaknesses. 

God did not create us to be anyone else!  He created you to be you and me to  be me.  You see, when we look at others and compare ourselves, we are in a sense saying that God should have made us with the qualities of the other person.  Without saying it out loud, our thoughts of comparison are saying loud and clear to the Lord that we feel He messed up!

We all know and would admit that God does not make mistakes right?  Then, why would we want to be like anyone else?  We are all different for a purpose and we all have been given a special privilege of being who we are.  God made me Ray's wife and no one else.  God made me Bradley and Brayden's mom and no one else.  No one else can fulfill these roles in my life, except for me.

If I look at others and say that they are better at this or that, it may very well be true.  However, if I feel that I am lacking in an area, it would be much more beneficial for me to seek the Lord and better myself in that area.  I could read a book or get advice.  I could take a class or do research; and then put those things into practice!  These things would benefit me much more than comparison.  Comparison truly gets you nowhere, except feeling bad about yourself.

My point is, instead of looking at others wishing we were better, we can with the Lord's help better ourselves.  So, I challenge you to think of an area where you'd like to be better.  Once you have determined what it is, write it down.  Tell someone, pray about it and change it.  I truly believe the Lord wants us to improve and He is ready and able to help us. There also may be areas where we are not meant to excel and that is ok! Let’s also be content with the strengths that we have and not feel like proving ourselves for acceptance is necessary. God gave us all individual strengths and talents for a reason. We can all work together as the body of Christ to fulfill His plans and purposes.

Don't let comparison to others kill your confidence!  You can gain confidence by improving yourself in some area.  Don't wait, begin working on that one thing today! When you feel you have improved, pray and seek the Lord for what else you can improve on.  I promise this will boost your confidence and will help you to quit comparing yourself to others.